Your legs are shaking and you feel like you could collapse unsteadily at any moment. Your voice immediately goes up two octaves, as if you swallowed a potato. And as smoothly as the story came out of your mouth when you prepared it on the couch yesterday, you now stumble over the words as non-smoothly. Fear of public speaking – it is a serious thing for many people. For years, I too found presentations more exciting than any job interview. How do you get rid of it? These 8 tips helped me overcome fear of public speaking.
Fear of public speaking, not what you want for that one pitch!
About three quarters of the American population suffer from fear of public speaking (yes, even that colleague who seems very confident in front of a group!). I also suffered from it for years. On paper I had everything clear and the story was fine in my head. But as soon as I had to present my ideas, panic struck. Not nice when I had to give an important pitch or had worked really hard on something and this was the supreme moment to talk about it.
Overcoming my fear of speaking
“I’m into writing, not into speaking,” is a statement I’ve made quite often. Giving presentations wasn’t my thing. If I had to give a presentation in my job or during my studies, I’d happily cast a hopeful glance at a colleague or fellow student right next to me.
My original strategy for fear of public speaking was this: avoid presentations. Whenever possible, I tried to avoid presentations. Worked perfectly! “But you can tell that story much better!” was a comment that often worked. My fear of public speaking was gone immediately if I could safely sit in the audience. But of course, that is not a long-term solution to overcome fear of public speaking.
When I got a job where I had to present (in front of more than three people), I had no choice but to face the fear. That’s how I discovered that there is only one way to overcome my fear of speaking: go right through it. Stand in front of the group. Complete with trembling legs and a breaking voice. But just do it anyway. After a while, I seized every opportunity to present. Just when I found it exciting (which was almost always the case!), I knew: this is what I have to do to get rid of it.
Over the years, I have received valuable tips from many people around me. From my father, who has been giving presentations for his work for decades. From a manager who was worth his weight in gold. And also from coaches who knew what works. I have collected the tips that work best for me. Who knows, they may also help you overcome your fear of speaking. Little by little, you will get there.
1. Present well prepared
How nice is it when you don’t have to search for words at the moment suprême, but already know what you’re going to say? It gives me a lot of support when I know my story inside and out in advance. Then it’s as if I only have to tell the story that I’ve told a hundred times already, one more time, not as if I’m doing something new and exciting.
Practice, practice, practice. And not just once, with your cup of coffee next to you, half an hour before you have to give your presentation. No, do it ten times. Maybe even more often. Instead of just presenting to your cat, you can also practice your presentation for friends or family. Maybe they have some feedback that you can use.
Bonus tip: make sure that the peripheral matters are well taken care of in advance. Huffing and puffing at the last minute because you got lost does not help to control your nerves. Computers that just start updating when you want to start PowerPoint do not help either. And discovering at the last moment that you forgot the attachment (your presentation!) to your e-mail to yourself, even less so. Smart to check all that a few times in advance!
2. Take a mini-break beforehand
Presenting always goes better when you are not tense when you go into the presentation. It is a bit difficult when the nerves are running through your body and your head is on “Hellup!” mode. But you can take a moment to calm down 5 to 10 minutes before the presentation.
Then do a short meditation or some yoga , stand or sit up straight and take a big sip of tea. If I have a tense conversation, I stop working 10 minutes beforehand. Then I can catch my breath before I go into a presentation.
Such a moment of rest also helps me personally to get my breathing under control. The more nervous I am, the higher I breathe. If you breathe in and out properly beforehand, I can keep it up better during the presentation.
3. Stick to the big picture only
When I gave presentations in middle school, I had my entire story figured out. I practiced until I could recite my entire presentation word for word like a French SO. But as soon as I stood in front of the class and started telling all about guinea pigs and how they eat hay and pellets, there was always a point where I lost the words. I would nervously search my piece of paper. Shit, what was I supposed to tell again? I lost my entire story if I couldn’t think of that one word.
Nowadays I don’t write out my presentations anymore, but I think of keywords and determine the topics in broad outline. I am absolutely not a talent for improvisation, but with a few key points on paper I can go a long way.
It has given me a lot of peace in my presentations that I no longer stick to one rehearsed story, but can form my sentences at that moment. The advantage is also that you lose the thread less quickly. And if you do, you don’t have to search endlessly on a cheat sheet for the sentence that you had so carefully thought out.
4. Don’t take yourself too seriously
When you are the center of attention in front of a group, it quickly feels like everything you say or do is under a magnifying glass. Silly slip of the tongue? They will think! Shaking leg? Everyone will see that, or so your fear of presentations makes you believe. But in reality, people are not as concerned with you as you think.
What helps me is to think about how I would look at my presentation if I were an audience member. A lot of people won’t remember every word. They won’t see your legs at all. People are focused on what you’re saying, not on YOU as a person. And if they are, it’s probably because it’s late in the day and they’re missing every word anyway.
So focus on your story and don’t focus too much on trivial details. How bad is it if you stumble over your words once? Or accidentally forget to set up a slide correctly? Everyone makes mistakes. And chances are that no one else will notice them but you.
Oh yes, another nice thought: the question of where to put your hands can be completely forgotten, according to presentation trainer Anton Swish . We can throw that key question (which I have asked myself so often) overboard.
5. Practice your entrance
Icebreakers are not only crucial when you see an attractive single man or woman sitting on a bar stool. A good start is also an excellent way to grab your audience by the scruff of the neck and to start your story with more confidence. For me, at least, I start my presentation more confidently when I know what I’m going to say first.
I am not a born presenter, nor am I an improvisational talent who can just shake it all out of her sleeve. But I can, if I have some time to think, put together a well-thought-out opening line in advance. I also invest time in that. With a good start I can hide my nerves, which also makes me stand more powerful.
6. Provide pauses in your story
Starting off well is one thing. But for me, the fear of speaking can still come up later if I 1) lose the thread, 2) can’t find the words, or 3) gasp for breath because I keep on rattling on. Fortunately, I once got a golden tip from a coach for that: let silences fall during your story.
“Yes, but isn’t that crazy?” was my first thought. No, it isn’t. A two-second silence may seem like an eternity to you; your audience barely notices it. Silences also seem to be tactical. I once learned from a research article that a silence after an important message draws more attention to what you have said. As if you give people some time to let it sink in. And that in addition to the fact that it also gives you peace in your presentation.
If I now notice that I can’t find the words or that I don’t have enough breath to say anything at all, I just take a sip of water or a big breath of air. Then I can continue with my story.
7. Believe “I am the expert” to overcome your fear of public speaking
Realize that you are completely in your story, your audience is not. You know the content inside and out, your audience has no idea. Trust that you are the person who can tell this story. And that even without a cheat sheet and even if your PowerPoint presentation is gone due to an acute power failure, you still know what you want to say and are completely in the content.
If you can believe that and focus on that (instead of on your hands, your knees or other trivial things), you will come far. I used that thought during my thesis presentation, for example. It helped me to not even be afraid of smart questions from the audience that I would not know the answer to.
And no, as long as you don’t start your presentation with your hands on your hips and the exclamation “I’m the expert here!”, there is nothing arrogant about it.
8. Be yourself while presenting
Learn from the great masters, is a common piece of advice for almost everything you want to grow in. Not entirely justified in my opinion. My first inclination to overcome presentation anxiety (after: get out of here!), was this: do as much as possible like others who are really good at presenting. And so I wanted to use more hand gestures, learn to speak louder, use a lower voice (I was given that tip once), set up my PowerPoints differently…
Actually, I wanted to do everything differently than I did. That’s exactly why I was squeezing myself into a presenter’s corset that I didn’t fit into at all during the entire presentation. My nerves didn’t get any less. If anything, they got more.
Now I see it differently: you can present differently than others. It is okay if you prefer to speak a little softer (ask for a microphone!). It is fine if you do not improvise, but prepare your story. There is also nothing wrong with staying in your place instead of walking back and forth. Find out what suits you and do not get distracted too much by what everyone else is doing.
Presenting becomes much more fun when you do it your way.
Overcoming Public Speaking Anxiety – Just Go for It!
Well, normal. It’s not normal. I get that. But presenting, facing your fear, telling your story and in the meantime cheerfully showing the door to all your chattering inner critics is the only way to overcome your fear of speaking.
The more often you duck and blame the presentations on someone else, the higher the threshold becomes. I have given presentations many times where I had the idea that it went completely badly. I still sometimes stand there shaking on my legs and have tension the day before. But I also know: I have to do this. That is the only way I can ever overcome my complete fear of speaking.
And remember: you are doing better than you think. Forget the idea that you are “not a good presenter”. Give yourself the chance to prove to your critical voice that you can present like a star.
